Do Aspies Feel Empathy?
One thing I wanted to make clear about is, how I so often read that “people with Asperger’s have no emotions”. Or “people with Asperger’s don’t care about other people or their feelings”. Well I wanted to clarify a few points about that.
I don’t know about other people on the spectrum because as they say, if you’ve met one person with Asperger’s, you’ve met one person with Asperger’s. So I can’t speak for any other aspies in this world.
However I myself, personally, FEEL A GREAT DEAL OF EMOTION.
I feel emotions very, very strongly.
I often feel so much rage I think I could kill all the people in the world (well all the baddies that is) with my bare fists.
If I love you and you go away and I miss you I’ll cry without stopping.
I would do anything for the people that I love.
I am also VERY, VERY KEENLY AWARE of the way other people feel.
I can tell if you are really sad, even if you are trying to hide it by faking a smile.
I can tell if you’re mad at me. But I won’t understand WHY you’re mad at me.
I can tell if you are lying.
In fact, I have so much empathy I even wrote an article about that topic. You can read up on it here: https://www.seasofmintaka.com/psychic-empathy-1.html
The main problem that I have, however, is that I feel so much what you are feeling, I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!
The main problem that I have, however, is that I feel so much what you are feeling, I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!
And that is because, I do admit, I’m not a very expressive person.
I might feel like bawling out loud. But I won’t bawl out loud in front of you.
I might believe in something strongly. But I’m not going to express my opinion in front of everyone, lest everyone else disagrees with me and gives me %&* (ie. a mouthful, to use a euphemism haha).
I want people to like me, so I wouldn’t do anything that would make them hate me!
If I see that you are depressed, I won’t know how to act with you. Personally, your depression would make me feel like bawling out loud. But as I just said, I refuse to bawl out loud in front of people.
But because that is what I feel like doing, but I refuse to do it, then I don’t know what to do.
So I don’t do anything.
I just sit and stare at you like an idiot.
The result is that you would probably think I’m an emotionless robot who FEELS NOTHING.
I might love you deeply. But I’m not a mushy-slushy sentimentalist who’s going to go around declaring my love out loud and openly to the world.
That’s just not my style.
So I would probably just sit and stare at you and wonder if I dare to hug you. If I hug you, would you get mad at me? Push me off? Reject me and make me feel bad?
So I don’t dare to take the risk. So I don’t hug you, or even tell you what I feel for you.
So then the result is that you would probably think I’m an emotionless robot who FEELS NOTHING for you.
But you couldn’t be more wrong about me.
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